Facing the Same Direction

Do you expect people to believe as you believe?  How do you respond when people react differently than anticipated?  What do you mentally say to yourself about the other person?

These are questions we might consider as we move into these final weeks of the year, especially as we try to survive in a fragmented and contentious world.

Does Group Think prevail in your friendships?

I remember walking around a small village in Britain.  There were many beautiful stone walls, made with local slate and rocks.  The artistry in the masonry showcased the skills of past generations:  stone walls that have withstood the passage of time.

Looking closely at the walls, there sometimes were similar patterns and other times each individual stone added support and strength.  I wondered at those times in my life where I only accepted ancestral truths or when individual and current understandings changed past perspectives.

Do you allow opposing views to strengthen
your understanding?

The beauty of dialogue — when we attempt to understand one another — comes from the elasticity of our mindsets.  That is:

• Can we consider that earlier or self-proclaimed truths may be incomplete? 
• Do we allow people freedom to come to other conclusions? 
• Will we stay in relationship when we differ?

Where does life grow?

As I walked along these village walls, oftentimes I came across plants rooted in the cracks and crevices.  Isn’t it amazing?!  Life grows even in the harshest and most unexpected places.

And, isn’t this true in our own relationships as well?  People rebound and heal even after the worst argument or separation.

Can you sit and consider that others
may be seeing life differently?

As we listen to the ideas, thoughts, and conclusions of family and friends this week:

• May we accept the messiness of life; 
• May we acknowledge that people can come to different conclusions; and, 
• May we seek to understand what others see.

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

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