History Tells Us: Where Life Takes Us

An elementary school friend and I have been meeting (virtually) every month for most of this year.  Our families knew each other through the church and our parish school.  We had a similar upbringing but then went our own ways in high school and followed our college interests.  Fifty years later we've reconnected.

When we began meeting, we knew we were different people than our childhood memories... but the question for each of us was: how have we changed? 

Which way is she facing?
(Photo:  Perceptions and Illusions, Facebook download)

Over a course of three months we talked about our family values (foundations), our religious or spiritual communities (inspiration), and the filters that define who we are now.  It was only then that we began talking about the more serious topics that govern our country and influence our worldviews.

We talked about the following guidelines before discussing these topics -- the "sandbox" we created to play in:

• Listening and asking questions to understand;
• Respecting the other person's lived experiences; and,
• Trying not to persuade the other person on one way of thinking.

When do you doubt your confidence?
(Photo credit:  Self-doubt and Self-confidence, Facebook download)

It's been a wonderful experiment in dialogue:

• Can I stay in relationship with someone who may have differing views?
• How do I respond when I feel tension or am uncomfortable?
• What happens when I doubt long-held beliefs?
• Where do I get my information? 

 One lesson I learned:  "Listen for the story." (Thanks, Darcy, for adding the aspect of My Story / Our Story.)

What are your "Don't Forgets"?
(Photo credit:  Don't Forget, Madalyn Beck)

Each of us has a story to tell:  the roads we have traveled; the hardships and challenges; the triumphs and lessons learned.  Being true to our personal values is important: being true to communal values is equally important.

What isn't always discussed, though, is the finite time and physical dimensions that limit us:  what it means to be human!  The only way I can move beyond My Limitations is to move from My Story to Our Story.  This means that I must respect Your Story.  As we listen... and learn from one another, My Story, Your Story and Our Story grow.  In other words, we learn to See Other in other.

Where has your life taken you?  How can I learn from you?

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

History Tells Us: Voices From Our Past

Boston is one city that all Americans should experience.  It overflows with voices from our past: ordinary people who lived, breathed, and fought for freedom.  As I walked around the city, American History came alive when I saw Old North Church, Paul Revere's statue, and other places that evoked the Boston Tea Party, the Midnight Ride, and Lexington and Concord.

Our hotel, being located in the midst of these historical sites, contained a series of wall panels with important quotes about liberty, justice, and the Common Good. 

How do you make good use of your freedom?
~ ~ Click on image to enlarge ~ ~
(Photo: John Adams,
Boston Harborside Inn - Larry Gardepie)

I have been reflecting on these wall panels over the past several weeks:

• Do we listen to the lessons of previous generations?
• Are we able -- or willing -- to change our current course?
• What inspires us to work for the good of others?

Do your actions inspire others?
~ ~ Click on image to enlarge ~ ~
(Photo: John Quincy Adams,
Boston Harborside Inn - Larry Gardepie)

What troubles me about the recent violence and rhetoric?  We are no longer involved in Civil Discourse.  Leaders and representatives from our earliest foundations disagreed on how to move forward, but they tried to engage in constructive, respectful, and productive conversations. Yes, they represented diverse colonies and interests, but they learned to listen to the needs of the other colonists as well.

What can you do for our country now?
~ ~ Click on image to enlarge ~ ~
(Photo: John F. Kennedy,
Boston Harborside Inn - Larry Gardepie)

This engagement carried responsibilities that future leaders understood: to perfect this imperfect union (Inspiration); to ask what you can do for others (Service); to learn to live together (Community).

These values and other truths became self-evident.

Are we living together or perishing?
~ ~ Click on image to enlarge ~ ~
(Photo: Martin Luther King, Jr.,
Boston Harborside Inn - Larry Gardepie)

Questions we may want to consider in the weeks ahead:

• Do I (we) listen to voices that divide... and why?
• Am I (we) living in fear of others... and why?
• How can I (we) listen and work toward healing?

As John Adams asks of us:  Do we understand how much our freedom cost previous generations? Are we making good use of that freedom?
 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting