Anticipation or Expectation?

As young children, my older brother and I would climb the fence that surrounded our back yard.  The fence had a flat top that allowed us to walk and balance ourselves around the perimeter of our familial boundary.  Sometimes I would follow him -- seeing who would fall off.  Sometimes we would start on opposite ends of the yard -- racing to see who would get halfway first.  When we were the most daring, we would see if we could pass the other person without falling off.

We were learning the skills of coordination and balance at a young age, and we learned to look beyond our limited yard into the neighbor's yards and the untamed gully that bounded our neighborhood.

How do you balance what you see and hear?
(Photo credit: Balancing Act Trio,
Randolph Rose Collection)

This image surfaced when I was with my brother earlier this week.  We no longer climb physical fences, but there are many situations and issues where we still need to balance our perspectives and coordinate beyond our limited viewpoints.

For many years I was a project manager.  Balancing and coordinating became important skills for the project teams to learn... along with differentiating between anticipation and expectation.

What do you anticipate will happen in a given situation?
(Photo credit:  How to Watch Super Bowl 54 as a Chiefs Fan,
Sports News)

I don't know about you, but I came to learn that there is a slight difference between anticipating an action or result and expecting it.  Both are future-focused, but one thinks or realizes what might happen ahead of time while the other projects onto a situation or person.

For instance, as project manager, I had to anticipate that Plan A might not work, and I had to be ready to pivot to Plan B immediately.  I also had to manage the expectations that others had of the outcomes of both plans.

Are your expectations getting in the way of relationships?
(Photo credit: Do You Understand Other People's Expectations?,
Praesta Insights)

As we balance plans and priorities with Loved Ones and friends, maybe we could step back and practice the skills learned as children:

• Identify the boundaries.
• Balance between what is anticipated and expected.
  
• Look beyond our limited views.
  

 Maybe that's how we navigate these unprecedented times where information and misinformation collide, inclusion and separation divide us, and boundaries of civility are crumbling.

Peace!
 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)

Gifts Revealed

When was the last time you were excited about receiving a gift?  The remembered anticipation of a child at Christmas... the wonder of the gift wrap... the mystery of what was hidden inside?

My older brother would unwrap slowly the gift wrap, hoping to keep remnants of it for future use.  Once the bows and ribbons were removed, I and my other siblings would rip into the paper.  Our curiosity could not be slowed.

As we grew older, we would try to guess what was inside before unwrapping the gift.  How well did we know the giver?  Did the giver listen to our wants and wishes?

What gift have you been offered?  Did you open it?
(Photo credit: The Tragedy of the Unopened Gift,
A Line From Linda)

When clothes were received rather than toys, it was sometimes difficult to hide the disappointment on our faces.  The unvarnished truth of childhood emotions while learning lessons of being thankful for what was received.

I don't recall ever putting a gift back in the box, though, and refusing it.  There may have been exchanges due to size or color or duplicate gifts, but the Gifts Received were seldom (if ever!) given back.

I wonder today about the gifts we are given each day: the mystery of each person we encounter and the slow unwrapping and revelation of the Person Hidden.  Do we give back what has been received?

How do you use the gifts received?
(Photo credit: How Many Combinations are Possible
Using 6 LEGO Bricks?, Chris Higgins)

I was reflecting on these thoughts while meeting with my supervisor, Jeff, this past week.  He is the type of supervisor who allows us to work from our strengths while challenging us to expand our skill sets.  He encourages us to unwrap the Talents Unexplored.

Jeff has a side hobby:  LEGO... but not what you would imagine!  He takes these individual bricks and bends the normal understanding of how LEGO structures should be built.  Some would describe his creations as illegal, not using LEGO bricks as they were intended.  Others see beauty and art.

The gift of Jeff is his unbounded curiosity... the willingness to explore... the ability to accept What Is while testing and revealing What Can be... the Gifts Hidden.

Can you look beyond the way it should be?
(Photo credit: BrickBending, Jeff Sanders)

Dialogue allows us to receive the Gift of Other, to encourage the slow unwrapping of what is inside, and to accept the Gift Given.  We are bending and adapting to what is and the possibilities of what can be.  Rather than challenging what is revealed by saying "It shouldn't be this way" we are invited to say, "Thank you for helping me see anew."

Questions to consider:

• How do you know if you are in a box?
• Have you boxed others in by your definitions of them?
• Can we recapture the joys of unwrapping the gifts of Self and Other?
  

May this week allow us to seek possibilities.  May we understand what boxes us in.  May our imagination and curiosity open the gifts of wonder and awe.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

A shout out to Jeff Sanders, who has taught me to dream of possibilities.  Check out his LEGO art:

• YouTube:     BrickBending  (https://www.youtube.com/brickbending)
  
• Instagram:   #brickbending or https://www.instagram.com/brickbending/
  
• TikTok:        @brickbending or https://www.tiktok.com/@brickbending
  

 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)