A Life of Contrasts

Isn't it amazing what our "smart phones" can do these days!  Besides guiding our daily activities using calendar, reminder, exercise, and health applications, we can stay in touch by texting, emails, social media... and the phone!  We can even monitor and control our "smart homes"!  And the camera captures memories that call us back to that moment when we stood still and wanted to remember.

On a recent trip, I was exploring the editing functions of my phone's camera.  Before playing with these features, I always prided myself at capturing what I saw -- as it was -- without embellishments.  I didn't realize all of the ways that I could crop, adjust, and photo-shop a picture with my phone.  It felt like cheating!

How often do you see a situation as "black and white"?
(Photo: South Seas Sunset - Larry Gardepie)

In the past, our cameras needed the correct film -- color or black-and-white -- and the right speed.  We adjusted the camera settings to match the film purchased, and we had to take 12, 24, or 36 pictures until that roll of film was used before changing to another speed or color.  It took time to have the film processed before we received the photos and could view our creations... and mistakes!

Now, within seconds, we can take a photo, review it, delete or reshoot it, edit and share it with family and friends.  Reviewing and remembering those photo-moments is much more fleeting as well.

When do you soften a situation to your comfort level?
(Photo: South Seas Sunset - Larry Gardepie)

As I was testing my phone camera's edit features, I wondered about what we have gained -- and lost -- as we manipulate what we see and capture.  Just as our physical tools (phones, tablets, and computers) have changed our way of connecting with the world, so too have our mental models:

• How we search for our likes, dislikes and interests;
• Where we go for news and entertainment; and,
  
• What we decide is true and relevant.

I must admit, there are times when I only want to see the Either-Or ("black-and-white") of a situation -- or -- I soften the contrasts of a situation to not feel so uncomfortable -- or -- I accept the true colors, understanding that Both-And is a possibility.

Can you sit with the beauty of the moment...As It Is?
(Photo: South Seas Sunset - Larry Gardepie)

I wonder how often in life we want to guide, monitor, control and edit the circumstances and contrasts of a situation?  Through awareness and reflection, we are invited to notice how our filters and mental models adjust what we are seeing and experiencing.  The question after noticing our filters is whether we can accept the beauty in the current situation -- As It Is.

Though I liked the editing features of my phone camera, I must admit... I enjoy the challenge of centering its lens on what is happening now, and knowing that the photo has not been adjusted allows my fading memory of that day to be revisited -- As It Was.

May the blessings of this Holy Season of Ramadan, Passover, and Easter draw us back to the spiritual reflection and growth of our traditions... the memories of How It Was... and Is... today!

P.S.  Which one of the three photos did you like the best -- and why?

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)

To Reframe or Not To Reframe

Have you ever sat for hours in nature, or stared at a painting, a sculpture... or another person?  Rotating an object in your hand or sitting in different places to appreciate another view?  At any moment the object changes... maybe not physically.... but in our mind's eye and what we now see... or understand.

Early on in my life I was fascinated that what I understood before about a person, a situation, or a truth could change over time.  Think of your progression through elementary and high school:  the building blocks of information we received that seemed to change as more information -- and experiences -- entered our lives.

My childhood was filled with endless field trips of learning and being open to new information, insights, and knowledge.

Which facet of an issue do you tend to focus?
(Photo credit:  Diamonds created in minutes at
room temperature, Advanced Science News)

Centuries ago Heraclitus said, "The only constant in life is change."  If change is a constant, why am I no longer as flexible with or excited about these daily changes?  As I have grown older, I tend to focus on one side of an issue or problem and don't inquire about or listen to another facet or perspective as much as I did in the past.

The Child Fascinated with change is still within, but what happened in adulthood that tired me of new ways of thinking and the constancy of change?

How do you respond to gloomy forecasts?
(Photo:  Tropical storm over Panama City
- Larry Gardepie)

Mentioning this to a friend recently, I spoke about my fear of becoming Rigid.  He asked what that word meant to me and what I feared.  By slowing down, letting the emotions surface, and talking to another person, I saw how change was constant in my life... but there have always been ebbs and flows of how I managed or responded to change.

For me, the importance of Framing and Reframing the change event must be balanced -- that is, I must:

• Hold lightly to any long-held values and beliefs;
  
• Test any assumptions and conclusions that have framed my understanding; and
• Consider that others might see, understand, and respond differently (reframing).
  

I must look and consider from multiple vantage points, moving and reconsidering.

Can you see a different perspective?
(Photo: Arches National Park, Utah
- Larry Gardepie)

Also, I am just beginning to understand that labeling (e.g., being rigid) might limit my ability to stay open to other possibilities and insights.  That is, once I label a situation as Right or Wrong, Good or Bad, Dark or Light, Hopeless or Hopeful I may have entered a cul-de-sac of my life that needs to be explored:

• Have I created a dead-end in my thought process?
• Do I believe that I possess the only truth?
  
• Am I open to other possibilities? 

Without the ability to reframe a situation -- or a way of thinking, it is as if my finite being no longer wishes to explore the Infinite Wisdom surrounding us and giving meaning to our lives.  We shut off one another!

This week, may we anticipate and explore the changes of this post-COVID world, and may we be open to constant change!

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)