Untapped Re's

This past weekend I was back "home" -- the town where my siblings and I were raised after my parents, my older brother, and I moved from Iowa to California.  A group of us met for two days to sort through, document, digitize and store poster boards, photos, and albums from our elementary school years.  We ended up with five 27-gallon storage bins of items... and accompanying memories!

Several stories were shared as we reminisced about our childhood years and growing up in our close-knit neighborhoods.  Life seemed simpler as beautiful remembrances floated around the "gym" (our former parish hall and the original church building).

What memories are beautiful in your mind?
(Photo:  Purple Carpet along Ocean View Blvd.,
Pacific Grove, CA - Larry Gardepie)

This act of Reminiscing and Remembering caused other Re's to float to the surface:

• Re-connecting with childhood friends.
  
• Re-examining life's choices and decisions.
  
• Reconciling past hurts and misunderstandings.
  

I wondered how often these Re's have gone untapped in my life... that is, until I slow down and Re-capture what is important.

What bridges can you build in difficult situations?
(Photo:  Ocean and Shoreline Meet at Pacific Grove - Larry Gardepie)

One dialogue-related "Re" is the Re-do, the ability to pause a conversation when it goes sideways, talk about what each person is thinking and feeling, and explore what words may have triggered uneasiness in the relationship.  Then, the Re-skill begins:  testing out other word choices which respect the intent of the original conversation and allows each person to listen and understand anew.

This practice of Redo -- doing over -- helps us to tap into a desire to Stay in Relationship, even when difficult conversations need to occur.

Is there a way to move above a situation and see it more clearly?
(Photo: Aerial View of San Diego and Coronado Bridge - Larry Gardepie)

Are there other Re-words that can:

• Improve clarity and understanding?
• Build bridges instead of walls?
• Remind us of our common humanity?
  

What do you think?

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)

Stories Untold

Life is amazing!  Think back on your childhood -- or if you are a parent, think back when your children were little:

• The world was a wonder to be explored.
• Everything was new, mysterious, and an adventure.
• Learning and growth were the norm.

We smiled and clapped at every discovery.  We were cheered on with each accomplishment and milestone.  We walked through many doors with anticipation... and sometimes with fear and caution.  But, in those moments, I remember being encouraged to try something new.

Do you experience joy at open doors in your life?
(Photo:  Balloon Arch - Larry Gardepie)

Childhood memories and stories were being remembered and shared this past weekend at my grade school's alumni reunion.  We were celebrating the school's 65th anniversary.  As a member of the planning committee, I saw the reunion ideas form and come to life.  Leading up to the event, the empty parish hall was transformed outwardly with balloons, flowers, table clothes, photos, candles, and every festive object that reminded us of the school.

 

What was also fascinating?  The transformation of the alumni as they walked through the doors and saw long-forgotten faces, and began sharing tales and reconnecting with their childhood innocence, curiosity, and energy.

Are you ready for the party to begin?
(Photo:  Empty Hall - Larry Gardepie)

Isn't that what life is about:  the reconnecting of past and present; the joining of our world experience with others; the rekindling of what is lost and finding new ways to experience life?

 

Questions that we may want to ask ourselves:

• Have we lost the ability to wonder and explore... why?
• If we no longer cheer on accomplishments and milestones... why?
• Do we encourage others... do we feel encouraged... why?

When and where do you enjoy your friendships?
(Photo: Enjoying Friends - Larry Gardepie)

A fun point in the reunion was the school tour:  we saw the small, child-sized desks we had outgrown; we drank from the fountains that were too low for our adult bodies; we heard how different current teaching methods are; and we ran to the swing sets to see who could fly the highest!

 

Time has changed, and so has our world.  Maybe we need moments like these to remind us to reconnect with others... to re-union (re-unite) with ourselves and the childhood wonder of the stories untold.
 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)

Connections

Over the past several weeks, I have been working on reconnecting with classmates and friends from grade school.  Our school is celebrating its 65th anniversary this year so a few of us have begun planning an in-person reunion to help celebrate this milestone.

In the process of searching for alumni and gathering contact information, I have noticed that long-forgotten memories have begun surfacing:  favorite teachers and subjects; birthday parties and sleepovers; spelling bees and competitions.

Looking back, it seems like life was simpler, naive and more carefree.

Are you aware of what connects you?
~~ Click on image to enlarge ~~
(Photo credit:  Bizarro, Wayno & Piraro, 04/26/23)

But was it?  For our parents and teachers, they were in roles of providing for our well-being, education, and safety.  Our role was to learn and follow the structures and discipline that was provided.  The complexity and simplicity probably depended on the role and responsibility of each person.

I am finding that these earlier connections are still present -- even though dormant these many decades as I moved on with my life.  Memories of graduating from elementary and high schools, then on to college... first jobs... graduate school... and a career.  At each stage, it felt like jumping off a cliff -- freedom and fewer safety nets; unknowns but a tangle of old and new connections; adventures but a similarity when I landed.  Connections -- both complex and simple.

When do you feel the most unconnected?
(Photo:  Mazatlan cliff diver - Larry Gardepie)

The Structures Learned and Connections Remembered provide solace in moments of uncertainty.  Paying attention and making decisions rooted in previous experiences allowed us to swing like Tarzan and Jane through our childhood -- moving from our childhood Family Tree to a broader Tree of Life.

The importance, I believe, is noticing what has illuminated the paths we have chosen -- what we have held onto or let go... connections.

What helps to illuminate your path?
(Photo:  Nighttime departure, Hilo, Hawaii - Larry Gardepie)

Understanding the connections between Self and Others allows us to discover what is good and desirable.  Strengthening the connections that support and challenge allows us to learn and grow.  Seeing and listening allows us to connect information and test its validity.

I wonder... why are so many people these days trying to break the connections of structure, discipline, lessons learned and remembrance?

What are your thoughts?  Let's reconnect!

 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)