Knowing the Unknown

Sitting in the hotel lobby, we watched as other travelers checked in.  We were joining a tour group the next day for an 8-day trip through several Arizona and Utah national parks.  We knew that 42 people were signed up for the trip.

Watching people and their bags, we made comments to one another:  "I bet they are on our tour." and "They look like tour people."  Our assumptions were based on age and luggage:  we assumed this would be an older group and we were supposed to have only one checked bag and one carry-on bag.

What stories do we create about what we see?
(Photo:  hotel lobby - Bellagio Hotel, Las Vegas,
Larry Gardepie)

In reality, we only knew how many people had signed up for the tour and the stated baggage allotment.  The age group was an assumption based on similar pre-COVID tours, and we assumed that people would follow the baggage requirements.  We had arrived one day early to explore Scottsdale.  Our tour group didn't need to check in until the next afternoon, and we were leaving the morning after check-in.

Later in the day we were sitting in the lobby again, and we noticed a tour manager welcoming some of these same people, giving instructions, and providing additional information.  We asked this tour guide what was happening, and we found out that a separate tour (14-days) was checking in and would be leaving the day before us.

Where do we focus?
(Photo:  Hoodoos at Bryce Canyon, Larry Gardepie)

We were focused on our 8-day tour, so our observations, assumptions, and conclusions were based on what we knew.  What was unknown to us earlier:  several tours were leaving from this hotel over the next few days!

I wonder how often this happens to us:

• We focus on what we know;
  
• We make assumptions and conclusions based on these known facts; and
  
• We don't know other information that might change the outcome?

I also wonder if we are we willing to withhold judgment, check out our assumptions, and the stories we have created?

What is hidden from what we say to others?
(Photo:  Pulpit Rock, Zion National Park, Larry Gardepie)

 As we enter this new week, may we learn to:

• Hold Space within ourselves that other possibilities exist;
• Ask Questions to gather more information; and,
  
• Seek to Understand what we do not know.
  

 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)

The Wonder of Knowing

Listening to this week's Impeachment Trial I am struck by how little of the story I know fully, am willing to hear, and want to believe.  Watching the replays of the January 6th U.S. Capitol riot were painful, reliving those moments of reality and shock:  This is America today?  This is US?

In a way it was a relief to have the wound open, to actually see how deep our divisions are.  But what next?

I wonder:

• Is there a desire to heal?
• Are we willing to talk through what happened?
• Can we sit and notice the pain and unbelief, directions that are not yet clear?

Are there times when your thoughts are cloudy?

 
Like many of the Senators, though, our minds seem made up.  We leave the room.  We doodle.  We check our texts.  We see through our individual or group-identified filters, assumptions, and conclusions about The Other, not willing to consider another story.

 

I wonder:

• Am I willing to sit in my discomfort and listen?
• Are the transgressions so vast that I cannot take one step closer to you?
  
• Can I choose to look through other windows when mine become dirty or cloudy?

What filters keep you from seeing clearly?

It is true:  each of us must rely on the moral compass or value system that guides us.  But the challenge, I believe, is whether that compass or system excludes other meanings and conclusions.  There may be boundaries we deice not to cross... but does that mean we cannot try to understand what happened?

 

I wonder: 

• Has there been a time in my life when I was ALWAYS right?
• When have I ALWAYS known what to do?
  
• Do I ALWAYS see clearly the decisions I make... and their impact on you? 

 

When can you be your Authentic Self?
(Photo credit:  Twins are Becoming Less Common
in U.S., for Good Reasons, MedicineNet)

 
As we sit and notice the discomfort or shock in various parts of our lives, maybe the invitation is to WONDER:  to ask questions of ourselves and others; to listen and apply what we understand to the moral compass and value system; and to consider whether ALWAYS is the best way of knowing the truth.

 

Maybe the Wonder of Knowing is in the discovery of who we really are:

• People who want the best for self and others.
• People who cause pain to self and others.
• People who need forgiveness and healing.

 
May we seek to know and be known as we truly are!  May we wonder!
 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)