Perspectives of Dialogue

Every day brings reminders of the need to broaden our dialogue skills.  Whether with family, work colleagues, long-term friends or people passing through our lives, there are opportunities to explore and understand another perspective.

Living with someone provides frequent occasions to exercise our skills of noticing and compassion.  Whereas, long-distance relationships may allow longer moments of reflection as we anticipate a visit or phone call... and mull over what happened.

Traveling between Grand Junction, Colorado, and Moab, Utah, our tour director deliberately chose a lesser known river road to get off the freeway, slow down, and notice the unique landscape along the journey.

I wonder... what would it be like if we deliberately took a detour from our fast-paced lives, slowed down, and looked anew at people who are near and far?  Maybe we could revel in the beautiful landscape of our relationships.

The Perspective of Distance
(River road between Grand Junction and Moab)

When we arrived at Mesa Verde later in the trip, the tour director summarized a short hike down to the Cliff Palace as 12 steps down and one 8-foot ladder up.  Many of us braved the near-100 degree weather with that explanation in mind.  We stopped often along the path to relax in the shade, share water, and listen to the park ranger's stories of the Ancestral Puebloans.

An hour later, we realized that the director's earlier description was overly-simplified.  Yes, there were 12 steps down at the beginning, but immediately followed by an uneven sloping pathway down through rock walls and alongside the cliff edge.  Returning, there were three 8-foot ladders one right after the other.  A more strenuous hike than advertised!

I have learned that each of us filter, retain and recall differing aspects of reality.  I wonder... how does time influence our perspectives and the stories we repeat? 

The Perspective of the Past
(Cliff Palace, Mesa Verde)

Practicing our dialogue skills begins with noticing and reflecting upon information we take in; continues when we share what we have experienced; and, invites curiosity to surface.

I wonder:

• What has the other person seen, heard, and experienced?
• Can more than one understanding sit side by side without conflict?
• How will we decide what to believe, protect and repeat?

 

The Perspective of Reflection
(Another view from the river road)

The perspectives of distance, history, and reflection invite us to view the landscapes of our Life Journey through new lenses.  Are we willing to take a slight detour and explore?

May this week open us to new vistas.  May we capture the true essence of our relationships by listening and understanding the perspectives that are revealed through others.
 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)