Hidden Thoughts

Watching a herd of swans in Windsor, England, I noticed they were pressed together, facing the same direction, and waiting for tourists to feed them.  Some stayed calm while the bread was tossed; others were frantically trying to get to the food.  Hunger does that when self-survival is at stake.

This image came to mind as I read today’s news: the struggle for power and the desire for one ideology to dominate another — Self and Survival!

When are you challenged to blend in?
(Photo: Windsor Swans, England - Larry Gardepie)

Another image flashed across my mind:  our elementary and high school need to fit in and be like everyone else…or wanting others to Be Like Me.

Contradictions began stacking up as I reflected on these images:

• When do we truly become individuals… with so much of our commercial and political environments suggesting that we fit in and be like others?
• Can ideas and ideologies coexist… when we are in an endless loop of one way of thinking dominating another?
• Are Self and Survival hardwired… and will Others and their survival be denied?

What do you see from your hidden place?
(Photo: Salzburg, Austria - Larry Gardepie)

Fear surfaces when our language focuses on Us-or-Them. Low awareness tends to build walls to keep others out.  We fight for our survival… not realizing that we may be denying another person their survival.  Does it have to be this way, though?

We remember the schoolyard lessons of competition… Winning-Losing… and we somehow forget the importance of Sharing.

Living in fear requires that we band together, face the same direction, and value like-minded thinking.  Sharing opens us to the possibility that both can exist... and survive!

Is it possible to see beyond your hidden thoughts?
(Photo: Puye Cliff Dwellings, New Mexico - Larry Gardepie)

I wonder where our inner hunger comes from:

• The desire to become an individual with differing views?
• A willingness to accept someone for who they are?
• The need to form a community with varied talents and ideas?

As we move further into this New Year, let’s talk about our fears, seek ways to overcome them, and share our hidden thoughts.
 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

Sharing the Burden

These weekly blogs are my way of understanding our world... or should I say, "attempting to understand" what I have encountered this past week.  My reflections do not mean that I have solved, have figured out, or have truly grasped what is swirling around me.  This is one way for me to pose questions and insights for myself... and to seek your input and clarity.

Recently, I have been reflecting on the burdens that each of us carries:  sometimes silently shouldering the heavy weight of relationships gone awry; health issues that redirect our attention; or past stories that monopolize our time and energy.

I wonder:  because we intimately know our own stories and worries, how do we hear or understand another person's story... their burdens... what is weighing them down?

What burdens are you carrying?
(Photo credit:  Carrying Unnecessary Burdens, WBKO.net)

Why am I focused on burdens this week?  Mine haven't shifted, but I have had several texts or conversations with siblings, friends, and classmates from my 8th grade class.  As we listened together, the Stories Shared provided glimpses of similar and different experiences.  And, I noticed after each encounter, my problems seemed to lessen:  I was thinking about the other person, wondering how I could help, offering up prayers and intentions to stay in touch.

We really don't know what is going on in another life... unless we take time to reach out, ask questions, and listen.

Are you willing to tell your story?
(Photo credit:  Huddle Up: It's Story Time! -
The Many Benefits of Storytelling, Little Red Hen)

Also, I noticed that as a story was being revealed, my mind would jump ahead... filling in gaps of information, connecting the dots, and creating story endings.  In one instance, questions were asked, more of the story was revealed, and I found out how misguided my conclusions were!

I was using my life lessons and experiences to direct, filter, and complete another person's story.  The language of my burdens was distorting another person's reality.

When are you kind to others?
(Photo credit:  Heavy Burden, Pinterest - saved by Becki Albert)

On a side note, I find it interesting that so much time is spent streaming our entertainment, searching YouTube for snippets of topics that captivate us, and being addicted to our devices... yet excuses about limited time keep us from listening together to what is important.  Is it just me?  Or, is this strange?

Learning to share the burdens we carry may be the kindness that is needed right now: taking time away from our distractions to tell stories; listening and remaining curious; staying open to the endings as questions are asked; and walking away closer... together!

As a young mentor once told me, "We are a Pilgrim People" -- sharing the journey of life by walking together; caring for -- and carrying -- each other when the path is difficult.

May more of your story be revealed this week.  May your burdens become lighter as you talk to others.  May we be willing to travel through life with kindness.
 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

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