Pathways to Choice

Having grown up in the mild climates of the California coastal regions, I find the four seasons of other parts of our country intriguing!  Californians can sense the subtle shifts between Winter and Spring or Summer and Fall without having extreme temperature changes, but we sometimes miss the explosion of color that others encounter in the Fall or Spring.  The contrasts are powerful!

Even nuances in Southern California forecasts can be lost on visitors:  sunny with a few clouds, sunny with some clouds, and sunny with variable clouds may all seem to be the same for non-locals.  But, to locals, these are different!

And pity those tourists who come to San Diego during May or June, expecting sunshine!  Our May Gray and June Gloom may overshadow their visit (even though temperatures may be in the 70s)!

What relationships have cooled down in your life?

I wonder if Dialogue is like the weather, where:

• People know the local climate on hot topics?
• There are subtleties or nuances we don't always understand?
• We expect to find our definitions of reality to be true or accurate?

Where have you encountered a roadblock?

Maybe there are several choices when we encounter something unexpected, harsh words, misunderstandings, mistrust, or obstacles in our relationships.

What would happen if we:

• Slowed down and noticed (or, owned) our thoughts or feelings about the situation?
• Stepped back and questioned our expectations or conclusions?
• Asked questions of ourselves and others?

In other words, can we discover or explore the facts about varying positions to determine effective responses that will open new pathways?

Are we willing to create new pathways?

Like weather (where we cannot discount the weather in other regions -- it is what it is), the work of Dialogue requires that we become curious and knowledgeable about the personal climate other people are experiencing: their thoughts, feelings, and conclusions.

For example:  If the forecast is snow in Colorado, I might call a friend in Colorado to confirm what is happening before I pack for my trip.  In a similar way, I might call and check in on a friend or loved one, listening and asking questions.  Pathways open when I accept the reality the other person is experiencing.

May this week open routes to better dialogue!

 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)

 

 A friend shared this "Prayer for a Pandemic"
(by Fr. Larry Tensi, Archdiocese of Cincinnati)
~~ Click on image to enlarge ~~