Have you ever felt uncomfortable with a supervisor, coworker, or friend? Maybe they crossed the line on a topic or position important to you. Maybe confidences were shared or gossip exchanged.
In a recent conversation, someone mentioned that her boss had crossed some boundaries. Listening to her describe the situation, I asked what the boundaries were and if the boss was aware of these boundaries.
This conversation allowed me to reflect on my own experiences:
- What boundaries have I created?
- What do I do when someone crosses my line in the sand?
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| What boundaries have you set? (Photo credit: Getty Images) |
After more questions and exploration, we discovered that this person becomes triggered when the boss uses words like "You are..." or "When you do..." We soon realized that boundaries weren't necessarily being crossed. It was a matter that labels were defining her: she was feeling boxed in by another person's definition of her.
Growth is limited when a person feels boxed in: labels and definitions restrict discovery and learning.
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| Are you boxed in by others? (Photo credit: Stacking 18 People in Boxes for a Family Photo, Scavenger Chic) |
Questions for each of us to ponder:
- Are we aware of the boxes that limit us?
- How do we break out of the boxes others have placed us in... or that we create for ourselves?
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| When do you feel boxed in? (Photo credit: Boxes are People Too, That Cute Site) |
I am learning through my dialogue practice that:
- Slowing down and noticing are keys to discovery.
- Sharing our experiences and listening to others are keys to connection.
- Holding lightly what we have noticed and have shared is a key to nonviolence.
May this week allow us to see beyond the boundaries and boxes that diminish our human potential: may we use the keys that are in our possession and may we unlock the divisions we have created!
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