What is the Question?

Have you ever counted the number of questions you ask each day?  I started... one day... then noticed I got bored and moved on.  I kept waiting for a question to arise, but became distracted with work, projects, and searching the web.  Maybe that individual mining of information on the internet is where my inquisitiveness is directed these days.

But, do you remember:

• The spontaneous inquisitiveness of a 3 year old?
• The adage, "There's no such thing as a stupid question"?
•  The game, "20 Questions"?
  

It seems that curiosity and questions were social activities:  discovering the world by asking one another what we thought or were thinking and feeling.

How many questions do you ask a day?
(Photo credit:  Asking Questions is Really Hard,
Huffpost - The Blog)

There are moments in life when we are left with questions... that are meant to be asked.... that may not have answers.  I wonder why we don't ask them?  Are we afraid of the answers?  The interaction?  The unknowing?

I read in a dialogue book recently that 40% of questions are actually statements in disguise and another 40% are judgments in disguise.  That leaves about 20% of our questions that truly spring from curiosity... where we are seeking to understand... that allow new information to be shared.

Are you curious about what others think?
(Photo credit: The Value of Listening,
Harvard Graduate School of Education)

Rather than counting how many questions I ask each day, maybe my focus should be on what generated the question:  sharing my view (a statement); projecting conclusions (judging); or exploration (curiosity).  It seems that the gift of discovery is what prompts a 3-year old's mind... that invites questions of the unknown... and allows us to engage together in a game of Question-Asking.

Just think of the societal transformation if we could relegate our statements and judgments into Advocacy (this is what I believe) and reserve the purity of our questions to genuine Inquiry (What do you think?... I really want to know about... Will you help me?).

Do your questions allow new ideas to
emerge from old thoughts?
(Photo: US Naval Military Sealift, San Diego)

By dismantling older ways of thinking and being, we might be able to experience the emergence of new information and knowledge.

Yes, the focus is on the types of questions we ask, but more importantly, I believe, is the relationship that spawns from these questions.  Are we willing to seek answers together rather than individual searches of the internet that lock us into our isolation?

Let us consider:

• What is the question?
• Am I curious about new information?
• Can I invite you into a relationship of discovery?

What do you think?
 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)