Hole-y Whole: Moving through Life

There are days when my creativity is gone; I am not sure what value I bring to my work team; and there seems to be a disconnect — or a “hole” — in what is being said and the meaning behind the words.  The world remains beautiful and whole, but my mind and heart swirls with missed opportunities and seemingly lost relationships.

Have you ever experienced one of these Hole-y Whole moments: when the world goes on but you feel left behind?

Have you ever felt like something is missing?

I find that when I am caught in low creativity, feeling undervalued, or being misunderstood, it is easy to feel separated... apart from others.  And, when I wallow in my Hole-y Separateness, I begin to look for someone to blame.  (Of course, it's not me!)

I had an experience of this recently at work.  It was a time when our positions and responsibilities were being redefined.  Many of us were trying to understand the changes, the new vision and goals, and where we fit in.  Where I felt like a valued member of the team earlier, my new role seemed to stand apart and disconnected from the other team members.  All of our paths were unclear; each of us — individually — were trying to understand what was expected.  As an organizational team, we were in Low Awareness.

Are there times when you feel separated from others?

What changed?  Our team had a series of meetings.  Our supervisor patiently described his vision, and noted when he didn’t have the answers to our questions.  Individually, we needed to reconnect and to make decisions about our worth and value.

What I found valuable through this time of disconnection and reconnection:

• Noticing my discomfort... and sharing my thoughts with others.
• Asking questions... and listening to the responses.
• Holding lightly to misunderstandings... and trying not to devalue another person.

In addition, I was able to talk to Loved Ones and friends -- people who knew me -- and I  shared my thoughts, feelings, and confusion.

Where can you discover beauty and wholeness?

The experience of reconnection in these weeks of Hole-y Whole Separateness became Holy, and offered me questions to consider:

• Do I recognize and accept the beauty in being connected and valued?
• What do I do and say when I feel devalued or separated from others?
• Where do I find balance: returning to those creative moments where I belong?

May you notice the Hole-y Whole moments in your life this week, and the ways you return to Holy Wholeness!

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)