Celebrating Life's Lessons

By now, I am sure that many of us have participated in a virtual meeting or an online gathering.  Zoom, What's App, MS Teams, FreeConferenceCall and FaceTime became household names when the pandemic began almost two years ago:  people needed ways to physically distance and yet stay connected.  Remote work and online learning suddenly became the norm as we were inserted into  "Brady Bunch" grids on our computer monitors.

I wonder, though:

• Was life any different than before the pandemic?
• Weren't we already skilled at boxing people in and keeping others at a distance?

 

How do you stay connected?
(Photo credit:  Brady Bunch, Wikipedia)

I was reflecting on these questions after participating in a friend's 80th birthday celebration this past week.  His wife had arranged a Zoom session where we could gather to share stories, participate in a trivia contest about Jim's life, and offer well wishes to our friend, loved one, and colleague.

Jim served at my church when I was in school.  Over the years he would guide me as a mentor and spiritual director.  We have stayed in touch through Christmas cards, emails, and virtual reunions.  Isn't it amazing when we have people in our lives who watch out, listen to, and challenge us?

What have you learned from others?
(Photo credit:  What Happens When Young
and Old Connect, Greater Good Magazine)

Celebration of Life, for me, has occurred when I begin to recognize the different boxes I have created... for self-protection; safe-keeping of treasures; or to define and limit myself and others.  A box is still a box whether I store memories or create expectations.

What I have learned from Jim and others is the importance of: (1) recognizing the human tendency to understand life by defining and labeling; and (2) letting go of these restrictions we place on life.

In other words, celebrating life is the act of being in the present and accepting the person who is before us:  the person I am right now and the gift I encounter in you.

When do you celebrate life's lessons?
(Photo credit:  Young Helping the Elderly)

As we walk together, it is the reciprocal actions of giving and receiving, guiding and learning, offering and accepting that allows us to acknowledge the gifts of Self and Other.  Knowing that I don't have to be perfect releases me from one boxed-image of myself.  Understanding that I don't have all the answers opens another box.  Hearing, appreciating, and accepting truths you have learned frees me from a binary framework of Right-Wrong, Yes-No, and Truth-Untruth.

Jim described us as Pilgrim People: journeying together -- sometimes leading, sometimes following, and sometimes carrying one another.  Whether physically distanced and remotely connected or being in the same room, the invitation is to reach out, open the boxes that surround us, and celebrate the gifts we discover.

What do you celebrate today?  What lessons have you learned and are willing to share?

Happy 80th Birthday, Jim!  And Happy 6th Anniversary of this blog!

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)

The Distance between Knowledge and Ignorance

I remember the wonder of discovery as I was growing up: watching insects inch along the sidewalk; clouds floating across the sky; raindrops ripple the surface of a puddle.  Each encounter with the world expanded my knowledge and understanding of my surroundings.

Growing up in a family with six children provided other opportunities to learn: how to interact; how to give and take; how to share and hold onto.  Formal education expanded the dimensions of what could be learned: reading, writing, math, sciences, health and safety, history and geography, and civics.  Attendance, participation, and conduct seemed as important as the academic subjects. 

Grades measured our progress with the goal of advancing to the next class level.  Our accomplishments followed us:  shaping how others thoughts of us... or how we saw ourselves.

What do you see in retrospect?
(Seattle skyline)

Throughout these stages of self-discovery and with the understanding of the world I played and worked in, I have been nagged by what I know... and don't know.  Early on, as information was being poured into my brain, I sensed that there was so much more to learn.  As I moved from elementary school to high school and then on to college, my confidence grew about how much I knew!

The shift from the earlier excitement of exploration to attaining knowledge was subtle: the thirst to learn was ever-present but head knowledge often overshadowed the wonder of heart and soul.  Grades became the measurement; self-image became the container, shelves stacked with self-importance because of what I knew.

What do you know for certain?
(Miniature library, artwork on Nieuw Amsterdam)

Albert Einstein once said: "The more I learn, the more I realize how much I don't know."  What an interesting -- and humbling -- reflection from a person regarded as exceptionally smart!

The study and practice of dialogue challenges me reclaim our childhood curiosity:

• To look and learn
  
• To wonder and connect
• To stand in awe at beauty and mystery

 

When do you see clearly?
(Stephens Passage, Juneau, Alaska)

Maybe the knowledge we have gained from family, friends, and education is not the endpoint.  Rather, they are stepping stones between ignorance and knowledge and back to ignorance.  The movement and rhythm of Humble Inquiry into the unknown.

Our world is vast.  Peoples and cultures are complex.  Our insights and understandings are limitless.  I wonder if we are called not towards certainty but towards Unfolding Truth who invites us into continual discovery?  I wonder if attendance, participation, and how we conduct ourselves are actually more important than the knowledge gained?

May we look beyond the portals of our understanding and seek what we don't understand.  May we look beyond our head knowledge and become more open to heart knowledge and compassion.  May we embrace the Ignorance of Not Knowing and invite curiosity back into our lives.

 

Larry Gardepie

Dialogue San Diego Consulting

(click on link for website)